[00:00:02] Speaker A: Welcome to Big ticketpros, the podcast for agencies, coaches and high end service providers who know what it takes to thrive in competitive market. I'm your host Ana Gonzalez and you can find me on social media at Annabelle Prime. Our guests share insider tips, strategies and sometimes cautionary tales to help you close bigger deals and scale your business faster.
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[email protected] that's conversationalfunnels.com Today's guest is Hector Besset.
Hector has been a CPA accountant for nearly 30 years and an entrepreneur since 2 29.
Throughout his life he has remained deeply committed to personal growth. Like many, he has faced his share of life challenges and he believes that his story is and lessons he has learned can provide comfort and connection to others. Hector understands the power of storytelling and how hearing our own struggles reflected in someone else's journey can rekindle hope and inspire resilience.
So Hector, welcome to Big Ticket Pros.
[00:01:24] Speaker B: Thank you very much. Great to be here.
[00:01:26] Speaker A: What is the best piece of advice you would give to someone just starting out in your industry?
[00:01:32] Speaker B: Yeah, I think I get asked that question a fair bit.
The first thing that comes to mind is that there is no one thing to know. Going into business is a big deal.
I think two. So I'd say two things. One is there's no one way to do it and I really encourage people to find out who they are. It's a personal journey. Look, there's only one hectobass on the planet. There might be one or two others with my same name, but I'm the only person that can be me. Same as you, Anna, you're the only person that can be you. It's, it's, it's a bit of a trite saying, a bit of a simplistic saying, but it's very true. And I'm a real believer in when you're getting advice, taking advice, take what you like and leave the rest.
So find your own way of doing business talk.
Which leads into the second thing, which is get help. Like my observation is the number one killer of businesses and human beings is pride.
People do not ask for help enough.
[00:02:47] Speaker A: And.
[00:02:49] Speaker B: Having had some fairly decent experience with life challenges.
It's tough to survive with the support of great people to try and do it by yourself as personally way too challenging. And and there's always people that know more stuff than you do. Talk to people like and some people are.
You have to develop the right people to speak with and, and develop who the right people for you are. You know you talk to your friends about business and generally they're full of good ideas that aren't good ideas at all.
But yeah so that's my two things is. Is fine find was three things. Really understand that, that it's a big undertaking if you want to do it well secondly that find your own way to do it and thirdly please please ask for help and expect to pay for it. Expect that it's going to cost you something.
Yep.
[00:03:50] Speaker A: You know I, I really really like what you're saying because usually that I think that not finding our personal journey is the route to a lot of unhappiness and 100 agree with that Anna. And also it can be the root of not being as successful.
It also depends on your definition of success but also not being successful in life. You know and it, it's the root of a lot of identity and existential crisis.
[00:04:31] Speaker B: Absolutely.
Yeah. 100 look I, I've. There's a support program that I've been part of for a long time and I've sort of just recommitted to it. And the number one promise in this support program says something like you discover your true self by learning to love and accept yourself.
And it's a really vague and potentially wishy washy statement but it is so profound.
And what's inherent in that Anna is that we all have and don't take the names, just take the names for what they are. It's just names.
We all have a false self. We all have a protective part of ourselves, a way that we present in the world.
And a lot of it's not authentic. A lot of it's not really who we are. We've been hurt in the past so we develop protective mechanisms.
You know we get hurt in a relationship we decide we're never going to do that again.
And over a lifetime and as a guy who's 56 years old who's just separated myself and kind of rediscovering who I am. It's in some ways I haven't known who I've been because I've been a father and a husband and a, and a business owner and a.
Yeah. And you would Understand this from a, from, from the usa. We kind of follow USA a lot here, right or wrong.
Our Western culture is mad.
It's just mad. It's all, you know, it's all about bigger, bigger, stronger, faster.
To go where? To do what?
To have more crap that we don't need.
And even the experience. Some of the things we. So people will go, oh, we don't seek things, we seek experiences.
Experiences can still also be filling a hole or filling a void. And it's that we need to find that place in our soul that's.
That's aching for something.
[00:06:42] Speaker A: I love that also. I think that in life, just because you're, you're describing all of this in life, there's cycles and there's cycles where we know who we are and we know what we want and what, what we're working on. And then it's a circle and then suddenly we're lost and we don't know anymore. And that's because everything changes. We change. We evolve.
You mentioned now I'm a father now I'm a new business now. Like, I can relate to all that. When I, When I became a mom, I was like, I don't, I don't know who this is. Like, I stopped being Anna to be my child's mom. And my name was not Anna anymore, it was Mom.
And it had to. I had to do a lot of work to get to know myself again or with businesses. We've gone through different businesses and each one of them requires a new you.
[00:07:45] Speaker B: Yeah, look, look, it's really interesting. This is really pertinent to some conversations I've been having recently. Anna, which is she. I was reflecting on.
And as I said, I've been. Just been separated after being with someone for 20 years and 22 years. And in some of my reflection, I can see some choices that were not so great and some things that I could do better and.
But I had a friend give me some feedback as I was sharing some of this reflective stuff.
And basically what she said is that, know I, I chose my wife because I knew she'd be a great mother and a great wife. And she has been, you know, and I, even though we're separate, I still love her and she's been a great mom.
And the only constant in life is that it's forever changing.
And, you know, there's lots of different explanations for it. And if you spoke to her, you'd probably get a slightly different version of the story of what happened and how came to be. But one summation is that that cycle is like, you know, I don't want to regret the last 20 years of my life. I've got three fabulous teenage boys.
I. I don't regret any of it, Anna. I don't regret any of it. And the, the fact that it's changing.
Yes, that's challenging and difficult to let go of something that I thought was going to be forever.
[00:09:22] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:09:25] Speaker B: But life's full of things like that. You think, you think life's going one way.
[00:09:31] Speaker A: It is very true. It doesn't.
[00:09:32] Speaker B: And it's.
I didn't quite mean to get that emotional about that, but that's, but that's, that's where I'm at. That's what. That's. That this is the stage of life. I'm going through some changes and they're significant. And, and it's. No, it's. No one thing like, is sad, but it's also quite exciting. I'm starting to feel a liberation in a direction that I haven't felt. Like you said, you know, you. There's an upside. You know, you, you became mum and you. And, and you know, you, you wouldn't.
You wouldn't change that for anything, would you, Anna?
[00:10:08] Speaker A: I would not. It's been, you know, it's the biggest challenges that I've taken in my life, but it's also the most rewarding.
[00:10:16] Speaker B: Absolutely.
[00:10:18] Speaker A: And I also love what you said because I think we can tie this to life and to business. Find your own way and get help. I was a.
I don't know how many know how many people here, the show know this. I was a single mom for a lot of years, but I, Even though it was very challenging without the people around me, I think it would have been more challenging. And also in business, I wouldn't be able to do anything without the help of the team that we have in the back making everything happen.
[00:10:54] Speaker B: Yeah, 100%. And look, it's absolutely applicable to business. And this is partly what I'm.
I've. I've developed a coaching program that started based around cash flow, you know, because that's what I know and that's. And it's a massive problem for a lot of businesses. So. But cash flow and financials is all just a window into the business to help you understand the, the decisions you make and the impacts that they have.
And a big part of being an effective managing director or business owner is having your life be the way that your whole life be the way you want it. And that comes back to what you're saying. About, you know, it sounds vague, but you need to discover who you are and what you're really about, not what you've been taught at school or at church or in your family of origin or your siblings. And maybe there's some threads of helpfulness and all of that, but there's a lot of conditioning in our environment. There's lots of conditioning that you really need to kind of shake off and spend some time.
The program that I'm working on is called Hurry up and slow Down.
It's like we get so busy and one of the biggest accesses to working out what it is you want and the direction you want to take your life in is slow down, breathe, take some time, talk to the people that you love, spend time with your kids, walk in the park, take your shoes off.
All sounds a bit hippy ish, but that's my version of it. Anyway, they're the things that really help me see things clearly.
[00:12:47] Speaker A: That's awesome. So, Hector, one more question.
We're talking about finding your own way and getting help. Yes. Get, get away. Like get your ego away and get help. What would be the first step, in your opinion, for the people need to take so that they can find their own way, they can find themselves so they can have the business and the life that they want.
[00:13:20] Speaker B: I think it's about having the right people.
Above is not the right way, but not so much your team. You need to have a good team of people, but the people like a coach, I think coach or, or personally a therapist to help you unravel ourselves. We're complex, dynamic people and, and depending on what your beliefs are about, spirituality and how we were created, we were, we were created to be in relationship. We were created to be in community. And so the reality is we work better in community and you have to find the right people. And I've. I've always, pretty much always had a coach in the 15 years I've had the business, I've had a counselor a long time and a therapist and different, different people who fulfilled those roles.
And I've had a few experiences that haven't been great experiences.
So I, I think part of what I'm saying is find somebody and, and even if it's challenging, just try, try somebody.
Do your due diligence. You know, with coaches, there's lots of very interesting coaches out there.
Make sure you do do your due diligence before you engage and pay money to people, but find somebody who knows more than you do, has a perspective that you don't, has Created a business that's inspirational. You know, it's. And read. Read and. Or listen if you're. I don't read so much. I listen to audiobooks.
The stuff that lights you up and doesn't light you up and. Yeah. Learn.
[00:15:02] Speaker A: Great. I think I would put it.
My takeaway in a very. In a very girly way is it would be like, find your glow and flow in it and then find people with their own glow that complement yours and.
[00:15:22] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:15:23] Speaker A: And find how you can complement theirs and then flow together.
[00:15:27] Speaker B: Absolutely. Yeah. And so you. And that's. And see, that's. And that's how you can. Look, you've just given an example of, you know, two people listening to this.
Some will resonate more with what. How you put that. And some will resonate more with how I put that. So you go and find the people that you, you know, that's.
And it's not this. You don't necessarily find the people that are the same. See, I like to. I. I'm probably somewhere.
I like sort of spiritual, creative and I also like. Matter of fact, give me the. Give me the answers.
I'm somewhere in the middle. Some people drift either way, you know, so.
Yeah, that's. Yep. Well said. And you're.
My expertise aren't always in being concise. I can often use a lot of words where you used a lot fewer than I did but said a similar thing.
[00:16:25] Speaker A: So, Hector, we're going to wrap it up here, actually. No.
Tell us about who you serve and how people can reach out to you.
[00:16:33] Speaker B: How people can reach out to me.
Go to the website is the easiest way.
Davidsonfrazer.co.nz it's davidsonfrazer co nz. Davidson Fraser is one word.
There's also a Facebook page that is Davidson Fraser as well. So either those.
[00:16:54] Speaker A: So awesome. So now we're going to wrap it up here. Thank you, Hector, for joining us and sharing some wisdom about thriving in a competitive industry.
You can learn more about what Hector does by visiting DavidsonFreezer Co NZ.
Is that right?
[00:17:11] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:17:11] Speaker A: Awesome. If you are an agency coach, professional services provider or otherwise sell expensive stuff, we'd love to have you in a future episode. You can
[email protected] and once again, if you want to learn about the new way, we're booking dozens of qualified calls per week with no ad spend. Download our free
[email protected] that's all for now. Go get that big ticket punched. See you later.
[00:17:36] Speaker B: Thanks.
